Language of Love

 When I was in college i read a book titled ' the 5 languages of love' by Gary Chapman. It is written from a Christian perspective. It explains how different people feel loved in different ways. and how it is important to find what language you are, but also what your partner is. You tend to show love in the way that you yourself feel loved. but a lot of times, your spouse doesn't have the same language. Hence where a lot of problems arise.
The 5 languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. I wont go into detail of each love language, but it is more deep than what it sounds.  for example receiving gifts is about the thought and effort (not materialism) and physical touch isn't all about sex :) you can take the assessment to find your love language here.
From the very beginning i knew mine was quality time. I need your full, undivided attention. put your phone down, turn the TV off. spend time with  me. for some people their language isn't as clear. mine was crystal clear:) Philip's is words of affirmation. which is one of my lower ones if I were to rank them. So it's hard for me to remember to stop and tell him that I appreciate him or how proud I am of him. but I am becoming more cognizant of that.
I think it is always a struggle for couples to communicate in a way that works well for both people. and I'm not saying that this theory solves all your problems. but it has helped me. not just in my marriage but in my life. because these apply to friendships as well.
you can learn more here
hope you take the quiz and find out what your language is :)